2 November 2012

Saying, 'I'm sorry'

I'm a bit of a romantic, and in order to kick back the other day I decided to watch Letters to Juliet. I won't go into the entire film, but I do want to draw something out to you from a scene within it.

The male lead is rude, and in the wrong, and his grandmother forces him to apologise to the female lead, looking her in the eyes and saying I'm sorry.

How often do we do that?

I remember doing so as a kid, if I was rude or mean or hurtful, being told to apologise sincerely, but I think somewhere along the line in adulthood we lose that practice.

Forgiveness and apology are vital parts of relationship. Why? Because in a relationship with someone you are close to, inevitably, at one point in time or another, one of you will upset the other. When this happens, there are two ways to move forward, either the one who was in the wrong apologises and the one who was wronged forgives, or the one in the wrong refuses to acknowledge their wrongdoing and the one who was wronged refuses to forgive and let go.

In my limited experience, the first way of action yields much better fruits than the latter, which leaves both parties bitter and resentful.

I think this especially important in Marriage. I can't help but wonder how many people might still be together today if they had sucked up their pride and done their part to resolve the situation. The problem is very often within each of us and not the other person.

"Where do wars and fights  come  from among you? Do they  not  come  from your  desires for  pleasure that war in your members?"
- James 4.1

"But brother goes to law against brother, and that before unbelievers! Now therefore, it is already an utter failure for you that you go to law against one another. Why do you not rather accept wrong? Why do you not rather  let yourselves  be cheated? No, you yourselves do wrong and cheat, and  you do  these things  to your  brethren!"
 - 1 Corinthians 6.6-8

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